


Not Even Fate

by 7sendra



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff, Heartbreak, Kid!Niall, Kid!Zayn, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Pining, Seperation, angst????, precious babies are precious
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-21
Updated: 2015-10-21
Packaged: 2018-04-27 10:30:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5044840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/7sendra/pseuds/7sendra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Niall moves to another new school and town because of his dad's job, he expects the usual making friends and learning new work that always comes with a new school. What he doesn't expect, is one Zayn Malik to come along and dredge up a mountain of feelings from the past. A mountain Niall had worked to hard to ignore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Even Fate

It’s only been a week and Niall already feels like he’s drowning. It’s a familiar feeling and strangely, not entirely unwelcome. Because whenever Niall drowns, he always seems to find himself washed ashore again, a new friendly hand helping him up and supporting him until the inevitable drowning circles around again. Like clockwork. Niall starts a new school, he hates it, doesn’t know a soul, and doesn’t know the new syllabus. Then, a kind soul with a heart of gold shows up, smiles at him, and shows him the ropes. They make quick friends only to have the metaphorical rug swept out from beneath them when Niall’s dad has to move again for work. Niall starts a new school and he hates it. Over and over so many times that Niall’s used to it by now. However, that never manages to stop him from making the same mistakes over and over again.

This time, his mistake is Liam. He comes in the form of a giant (and by giant Niall means _giant)_ puppy _._ Seriously does Liam split his time between smiling and CrossFit exclusively? He’s got these adorable brown eyes that shine when he smiles. He’s probably the most genuine person’s Niall has _ever_ met and he’s met _a lot_ of people.

“Niall, the new kid, right?”

“Yep. That’d be me!” Niall beams brightly at him, smoothing the small crease of doubt between Liam’s brows that this might not actually be the new kid’s name.

“Sick! I’m Liam.” Liam extends his hand for a firm shake before starting off down the hall in the direction Niall assumes – hopes – his Chemistry class is in. “I saw you in Chem on Wednesday and thought you might like a little direction. You looked a little lost.” Liam had leaned in toward him for the last part, as if it was a secret him and Niall shared. Niall liked Liam. Niall might have liked Liam as more than this cute guy showing him around if… Niall shook his head. _Pathetic really Horan, it’s been 5 years._

“Thanks! I was a little yeah.” Niall replies sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck out of habit. Niall wasn’t a shy person, per say, but he does get anxious around new people and being in a new environment. Liam merely patted him good-naturedly on the shoulder and steered him right at an intersection swarming with students.

“My pleasure. You looked like the friendly sort. Hey, you need a lab partner? Jane got sick and has to take a bunch of time off school so I’m kinda in need.” Liam huffed out as they neared what Niall now recognised as the science labs.

“Nope I’m free as a bird. That would be great actually. I thought I was gonna to have to ask the creepy guy in the back that kept flickin’ his lighter and eyeballin’ me suggestively.”  
Liam let out a full bodied laugh at that, shocking Niall a little before he chuckled along at his own joke.

“Haha yeah that’s Benny but mostly everyone calls him pyro-ben. He’s had that lighter since _sixth_ grade!” Liam exclaimed, his eyebrows raising for effect earning a half giggle half snort of surprise from Niall.

“Intense.”

“Yeah. He doesn’t really talk much so I wouldn’t worry. Stick with me mate, and you’ll be just fine.” Liam clapped him on the back, smiling warmly as they took their seat near the back. Yeah, that seemed pretty good to Niall.

Liam had said there were four of them, but failed to mention names or appearances apparently thinking it way more fun for Niall to meet them all randomly and individually. _Thanks for that one Liam_ Niall thought grumpily on his way to English. Fortunately, Liam had filled in these mystery friends that Niall (“the new kid with blue eyes, crazy blond hair and a perpetual smile” were his exact words to Harry apparently as he soon found out upon meeting him in English) was now their friend and should be treated as such. Harry had spotted him walking in and smiled immediately, waving him over to the spare desk behind him. Once seated, Harry swirled around somewhat awkwardly and smiled kindly.

“’m Harry! You must be Niall?” Harry had said before digging out his phone and showing the message from Liam. Niall had a good laugh at that before nodding greeting Harry properly. “So you’re from Ireland then?”

“Yeah, Mullingar specifically. We moved away when I was in 9th and have been all around ever since.”

“That’s so cool. I’ve always wished I came from somewhere different and exotic.”

“Mate, Ireland aint’ that exotic.” Niall laughed out at Harry’s little pout.

“Yeah but it’s _different_.” And suddenly it was like Niall knew Harry completely. He liked him, the soft slow way he talked and the way he seemed intently focused on your conversation, not matter how random or boring. Over the course of the English lesson, he would throw quiet remarks over his shoulder, forcing Niall to pinch his nose on quite a few occasions to save himself from a stern look from the teacher. Even so, he wasn’t quite so lucky every time.

Niall quickly fit himself into this small group of boys almost seamlessly. He’d met Louis last in music class and taken a like to him even before he knew he was friends with Liam and Harry. He was loud and bright and completely at ease in his own skin. Singing and dancing and making a general nuisance of himself, much to the teacher’s displeasure. They’d made quick friends and soon he felt like, with no effort at all, he had three friends he was going to absolutely love. He’d found himself laying away more nights than one with a cold hard pressure on his ribs when he thought of the inevitable day he’d have to leave. Niall sighed and rolled over, burying his head under a pillow. Oh well, he’d deal with that when it came. For now, he would enjoy what time he had with his new found friends.

The following Monday, however, threw Niall’s world into a turmoil he thought he’d left behind long ago. Niall had completely forgotten about Liam’s initial remark about how there were _four_ of them, not three. But he’d had a great weekend getting to know the three lads at Liam’s house playing FIFA and watching shit movies that he had completely forgotten there was one more member he was yet to meet. Louis was the one to remind him when the new school week finally rolled around and they were all seated in the lunch hall.

Everyone had been talking about light topics like assignments, football sign up and an upcoming party with Louis being rather quiet, just looking at Niall and not really contributing a lot to the conversation. He was beginning to think Louis’ staring was getting weird when he, completely out of the blue, asked, “Are you gay Niall?”

“Uh-”

“ _Louis!_ He hasn’t even been here a fortnight and you’re already trying…” Liam was cut off by Louis bright burst of laughter. He patted Liam soothingly before saying,

“No mate not for me. It’s Z ‘m thinking about. You’re just his type Niall.” Niall’s ears went bright pink at that and he averted his gaze back down to his lunch tray. Louis clapped happily. “Well I guess that answers the question then.”

“Lou-”

“Oh come on I’m a great matchmaker Haz. Don’t worry they’ll be shagging in the locker rooms soon enough.” Liam and Harry simply groaned and went back to their lunches, Niall watching the exchange with paler pink ears and slightly amused expression. “Ah! Speaking of, here’s our favourite juvenile delinquent now!”

“Oi shove off Lou.”

_Bradford._

Niall can’t breathe. _Bradford Bradford Bradford._ Time seemed to slow down as Niall’s eyes widened and his brain caught up to the accent. Five years, apparently, wasn’t enough time to stop fate apparently. Taller now, the Bradford boy Niall had known from so long ago came around to where Louis was sitting opposite Niall and gave him a flick on the neck. But Niall wasn’t paying any attention to Louis’ squawk of outrage, his attention was focused solely on the dark haired boy opposite him. Time was _definitely_ moving slower because _how come he still hasn’t seen me yet Jesus fuck._ He’s changed a lot, obviously, with long lean limbs and cheek bones that could cut glass. His jaw has more shape to it and the dark blue circles under his eyes from when Niall last saw him were gone completely. Niall’s staring and he knows he is, he can hear Harry snicker faintly beside him but he doesn’t care. Harry has no idea… and then Zayn’s looking at him for the first time in 5 years and it’s all Niall can do to keep breathing. Looking into those deep brown eyes, all of a sudden, he’s 13 again and his heart is only beginning to break.

_“I’m leaving.” Zayn says from his perch on the small swing set. Niall freezes mid bounce, his basketball now forgotten and rolling away._

_“What?!” Zayn doesn’t look up. He doesn’t even_ move _. Just sits there and only swinging when the wind pushes his thin frame. “Don’t fuck with me Malik-”_

_“I’m not fucking with you Niall!” Zayn snaps head up and there are tears in his eyes and no Niall can’t do this, he just can’t! “M-my dad saw us, the other day when I walked you home,” Zayn sniffles and wipes his nose against his sleeve. Niall didn’t move a muscle, couldn’t If he tried. “He went completely insane. H-h-he was shouting so much and…” Niall snapped out of his riviere, coming to when Zayn’s shoulders began shaking with an obvious effort to contain his distress. Quickly moving to kneel between Zayn’s legs, he grabbed his thin hands and squeezed them tight._

_“Hey! Hey its ok you don’t have to…” Niall trailed off, unsure of how to continue but Zayn got it. He always got Niall. He took a deep breath and said instead,_

_“He says we have to leave or I might try see you again. Niall, shit, I’m so sorry. I-I’m gonna text you every day and skype you and emails and shit and whatever else I’m so…” everything else was muffled by Niall’s chest as ‘he surged up to hug him tight. Niall and Zayn had been friends for a long time, and together for a substantial part of it. At least, that’s what it felt like to Niall. They’d become friends in 3 rd grade when Zayn had been teased for being too quiet. Niall had shouted for the entire week, exclaiming that Niall would make up for Zayn’s lack of sound if he didn’t want to talk and now here they were, thirteen and scared shitless of a future without the other in it. They were supposed to be forever. _

Niall faintly becomes aware of Louis snapping his fingers in both their faces, saying something about how he’s pretty sure no one’s in the C-block bathrooms at this present time. Liam’s rolling his eyes and Harry’s just giggling. But he can’t stop looking at Zayn. His breathing shallow and uneven. Suddenly, he doesn’t want to be there. He needs to leave, like, _right now_ , or he might start hyperventilating and throw up all over the floor. Zayn’s mouth is moving but nothing’s coming out and as he’s staring at those beautiful lips he’s assaulted with another memory.

_Its late spring, summer just on the edge of each day, and Zayn’s laying stretched out in the cool grass under their favourite tree. They don’t speak, just share companionable silence for a while. Niall’s lounging in the tree, looking down on Zayn with a warm flare in his stomach and an itch under his skin he can’t seem to scratch. He’d told his mum (though he didn’t say whom this feeling was about) and she’d simply smiled and said, ‘it’s called a crush honey. Looks like someone’s about to be a very lucky girl,’ with a wink and a ruffle of his hair._

_Zayn peered up at him from his spot, holding his gaze before yelling out “Nialler! Come down here where I can see your pretty face.”_

_They were in 6 th grade and Niall had a crush on his best friend and was freaking out about it. Zayn could tell something was up, obviously, he could always tell with Niall. Reluctantly, Niall removed himself from his perch and flopped down beside Zayn on the cool grass. _

_“You’ve been weird lately. Wassup?” Zayn asked, legitimate interesting quirking his eyebrow as he peered over at Niall. Niall sighed, contemplating his next words as he watched the clouds go past. Zayn poked him softly in the ribs when he’d spent too long staring at the sky and, before he knew it, the words were rushing past his lips._

_“I’ve been thinking about kissing you.” As soon as they were out, Niall snapped his head to look at Zayn with wide eyes. Zayn didn’t look mad, as he’d expected, only thoughtful. “F-forget it. It was stupid. Wanna come back to mind and play games? I got a new-” But Niall didn’t get to finish because he was being tugged down and softly kissed by his best friend. It was just a soft peck, fleeting and sweet and suddenly Niall felt like a million dollars. Zayn just smiled up at him and said,_

_“Same.”_

“Uh, well this is getting a _bit_ weird I mean come on you’re not that pretty. Anyway, Zayn, this is-”

“Nialler?” Zayn’s voice was barely a whisper, more of a word carried over a small breath but Niall heard it none the less.

“Hey, how did you know that? Wait you gave him a nickname?!” Louis was only background noise at this point.

Niall shot out of his chair, startling not only the boys at his table, but quite a few students seated around them as well. “S-sorry lads I’m just gonna pop out for some air.” Niall wasn’t sorry, and he didn’t take his eyes of Zayn, his white knuckles curled tightly around his lunch tray, until he made is escape. He almost stumbled over his feet in his haste to untangle himself from his chair and scramble in the direction of the nearest exit. People were staring, he knew they were, but he didn’t care. He barely restrained himself from sprinting out of there but as soon he swung the doors open to the front of the school, he picked up his pace before finding a good spot to sing down against a cool brick wall and just breathe. In all honestly, Niall _probably_ reacted a tad dramatically but he wasn’t about to start apologising for it. Zayn was everything to him and now he was just suddenly _here._ Zayn was the first person that had kept him from drowning. Drowning in his own identity crisis, drowning in puberty, drowning in his first day of high school. He was his _best friend_ and the boy he was in love with and not even five years could change that in Niall’s mind. And now both of them have grown up and changed and Niall doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t know if he can look at Zayn and not feel everything he’d been trying so hard _not_ to feel for so long. He doesn’t know if they’re supposed to go back to square one and start again ‘ _Hi, my names Niall. I’m from Ireland it’s really nice t’ meet ya.’_

Niall shook his head, hitting it against the hard bricks behind him in an attempt to get his thoughts sorted and his shit together. Its ok, he could do this. He could walk back in there and look at the boy he’s been in love with since 6th grade and not throw his arms around him and sob helplessly for all the time they’d missed. A pleasant bitter thought entered his mind then. After all Zayn’s dad’s attempts to separate them, they’d ended up together again. Another memory, this one not so pleasant, came swirling up in his mind, a memory he thought he’d long since forgotten about even though the letter still sat tucked neatly between the mattress and the bed of every new house he’d had.

_Niall was in 10 th grade when his heart was finally broken. Zayn leaving had started it, but he’d managed to keep it somewhat intact. That was, until he’d received this: _

_Dear Nialler,_

_I’m sorry, but this is the last time I can talk to you. My parents keep finding the emails_ _I create to talk to you and they’ve taken my phone for good, it’s only a matter of time before they realise I’m actually_ hand _writing to you. I think this is for the best Niall, as much as I hate it too. We’re like pen pals with a really shit back story and you deserve better than that. You deserve someone who can talk to you on the phone or in person for hours on end. Someone who’s going to care about you in a way I can’t anymore. I love you Niall, but this is it for us I think. I guess maybe fate just didn’t want us to be together after all._

_I’m so sorry Niall. I really am._

_Always yours,_

_Niall didn’t get the letter for a long time. He had already moved from the address the letter was sent to so by the time the post sorted everything out, it had been months since it was written. He’d tried to write back, tried to contact Zayn on one of their emails but he got nothing, apparently already having moved again. Niall had almost not believed his apologies, he’d been so angry. How dare he just give up like that? He’d just given up on a friendship that had lasted almost eight years and a relationship of 4 (if you counted the time spent apart) with ‘this is it for us I think.’_

_Niall had cried and screamed and locked himself in his room for a week, the letter left where he’d opened it on his desk. Once he finally pulled himself together enough to put the damn thing away, he noticed the small origami crane in the envelope. Folded so neatly and carefully it pulled a small laugh from him. After turning it over fondly in his fingers he placed it on his night stand, just next to his lamp, and resigned himself to staring at that crane whenever he missed Zayn instead of contacting him like before. He’d stared at that little pink crane_ a lot.

“Niall?”

Niall looked toward the front door of the school as Liam popped his head out in search for him. He hadn’t seen him yet. It would be so easy to slip around the corner of the school and out of sight, but Liam deserved an explanation for what had happened. He was kind and open to Niall so Niall reasoned he deserved it in return. He slowly rose to his feet and wiped the tears tracking down his cheeks on his sleeve. “Hey.”

Liam turned to look at him with a slightly worried expression. More so, he looked confused. “Niall, do you wanna tell me what the fuck is going on?”

Niall barely managed a wet laugh before fresh tears tracked down his cheeks again. He wasn’t really crying, but they kept coming as if all the emotion he’d worked so hard to ignore was forcing itself free. “Za-Zayn and I have somewhat of a history.”

“Uh that’s putting it a little mildly.” Liam announced as he strode toward Niall. “Sorry, it’s just I’ve known Zayn since he moved here in the beginning of 10th grade and I’ve _never_ seen him like that.”

Niall huffed out a short laugh before slumping against the brick wall. Shoving his hands deep in his pockets, he looked over at Liam again to see him standing expectantly, waiting for some kind of answer. Niall could only shrug. “Look mate I don’t know what to say. We’ve got somewhat of a long and kinda messed up history and I haven’t…” Niall sucked in a deep breath before tilting his head up and away from Liam’s speculative gaze, “I haven’t seen Zayn in a long time and this was the last place I thought I would see him so I’m really sorry if I freaked you out but I’m a little freaked out too.” His words spilled out in a breathy rush but he could tell by Liam’s face when he gazed back over at him that he understood. Fuck Liam was a nice guy.

“Ok so you’ve got a history, doesn’t everybody?”

Niall smiled bitterly and kicked his toe into the dirt, “Yeah probably I just… can’t seem to let it go.” Only mumbling the last part, Niall thought Liam missed him completely when he just ploughed on with questions.

“How long’s a long time then?”

“Haven’t spoken to him in 2 years haven’t seen him in 5.”

“When did you meet?”

“When we were in third grade and Zayn seemed too nice to be bullied.”

Liam was quiet for a moment before slowly asking, “Are you in love with him then?”

“Mate, I would’ve thought that was pretty obvious.” Niall let out a nervous laugh before looking back toward Liam. He wasn’t smiling, instead, a small scowl lined his face. Huh, normally nice Liam was looking decidedly… oh.

“Are… are _you_ in love with him?” Niall asked tentatively. He couldn’t help the sharp twist of jealousy in his stomach at the words. 5 years is a long time and he wouldn’t blame Zayn but… still. Liam’s expression only caused the sharpness to twist harder.

“ _What!? N-no!_ I’m not _in love with him_. He’s like my best mate, I wouldn’t…” But even as he was saying it, Niall knew he was lying because he’d been where Liam is now. Helplessly in love with your best mate and freaking out about it. In retrospect, Niall’s experience did end with somewhat of a happy ending. That was, until, the post fairy-tale when everything just completely fell to shit.

Liam’s shoulders sagged and he dropped his face into his hands, knowing completely that he was a pathetic liar. “It’s more like a crush, really.”

“Mm.” Niall doesn’t really know what to say after that. Liam’s amazing and if Zayn has moved on and they have something, Niall doesn’t really have a right to step in and do anything. Besides, that’s what Zayn had said he wanted in his letter. But that didn’t make it any easier for Niall to think about. He always knew someday that the Zayn-shaped-hole in his heart would ease its ache and he’d have to adjust to the fact that Zayn would find someone else but he’d always imagined that being way down the track, after college even. He’d never, in his wildest craziest dreams imagined seeing him again in high school. He couldn’t do that to himself; let hope invade his heart that they might still have a chance while they’re young. He didn’t allow himself to dream and yet…

“Look, Liam, I think I’m just gonna-”

“ _Niall! Jesus fucking Christ Lou you don’t understand. NIALL!”_ Zayn burst from the school’s front doors, only barely stopping himself from going sprawling down the stairs. Harry and Louis followed close behind but Niall didn’t really spare a glance at them, he only had eyes for the beautiful Bradford boy storming towards him. For a terrifying moment, Niall didn’t know if Zayn was going to hug him or _punch_ him, his expression that intense. Only when he got close enough, did he whisper, “Please don’t run away from me again,” before wrapping Niall in what was possibly the tightest hug he’d had in his life. Niall was soon to respond, wrapping his arms tightly around Zayn’s slim shoulders and burying his face in the side of his neck. Before he knew it, he was crying again. Only this time, Niall felt every sob that ripped through him. He felt every emotion and every memory re-surface as he inhaled the familiar scent of _Zayn_. Although bigger and broader and _fitter,_ Zayn still felt like Zayn and its crazy how similar goodbye hugs can feel to a reunion hug. The only real difference is instead of feeling like his chest is about to cave in, Niall can feel warmth spreading through his every pore, something he hadn’t felt since that afternoon in the park. Hope.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello my sweets!  
> I hope you enjoyed this little fic (which will probably have a second chapter but not much more than that).  
> I got the idea in my head and just couldn't function until i'd written it out. It's a little rough but i hope you enjoyed the read! x  
> Please feel free to let me know what you thought!


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